Cami's conundrum: Dressing in public?

Ever since I have opened up about crossdressing, I have wondered about whether I should go out crossdressed.

This thought came up again today, when my wife and I were discussing whether Cami should go to the Gay and Lesbian Mardi Gras in Sydney.

My previous experiences going out dressed up have been interesting, but a mixed bag.  

In order to take a decision, I decided to reach deeper into my thoughts and consider why I crossdress. Two thoughts came to mind:

I crossdress to:

* express myself as a femme

* "let it go" after having to abide by gender norms after a 9-5 work week.

One other factor to consider is my "negative" desire to seek approval from others to justify my crossdressing.

So based on these aims and factors, would I enjoy crossdressing at the Mardi Gras?

Well, while the Mardi Gras might be a great place to be dressed in the parade, being dressed while watching the parade means you are surrounded by lots of gender-normative people.  Plus there are judgemental gender-normative people getting to and coming from the Mardi Gras. Being around these people would make me self-conscious, making me unlikely to "let it go" and express my femme-ness and more likely to indulge negative parts of my dressing, namely trying to seek others approval for my dressing.

Based on these factors, I have decided not to go to the Mardi Gras dressed. I'll go of course, with some wonderful colours painted on my nails, but not dressed.

I would like to go out dressed in the future, but I'm going to look for nurturing environments around like-minded people that I can enjoy and properly express my femme-ness rather than feel self-conscious.

Tall Women, Frozen, Facebook changes

Some wonderful positive things to talk about today!

You can download this and other podcasts from iTunes, search for The Genderqueer Universe.
Alternatively, right click on http://traffic.libsyn.com/crossdressingcanopy/20140215_Facebook_changes_Frozen_tall_women_clothes.mp3 to download the podcast.


1. Facebook Gender and Pronoun Settings: Which Way Will You Go?

http://crossdressingcanopy.blogspot.com.au/2014/02/facebook-gender-and-pronoun-settings.html

2. Animation Wonders

SheZow - http://www.abc.net.au/iview/ (for Australian viewers)

Frozen's show stopping song "Let It Go" - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=moSFlvxnbgk

3. Cordelia Fine - Delusions of Gender - The Real Science Behind Sex Differences - Childhood -

http://www.amazon.com/Delusions-Gender-Society-Neurosexism-Difference/dp/0393340244

4. Australian magazines

Vogue Australia Chinese Edition - http://crossdressingcanopy.blogspot.com.au/2014/02/vogue-australia-mandarin-edition.html

Raising my androgynous son Andrej Pejic - http://www.aww.com.au/news-features/in-the-mag/2013/3/raising-my-androgynous-son-andrej-pejic/

5. Tall women clothes

The best sites to buy clothes for tall women - http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/07/17/clothes-tall-women-_n_3605262.html

Tall by Design - http://tallbydesign.com.au/

Audrey Rosalie - http://tallbydesign.com.au/Products/New-Arrivals/Audrey-Dress-Rosalie.aspx

Alexa Dress - http://tallbydesign.com.au/Products/Dresses---Tunics/Alexa-Dress.aspx

Hepburn Shift - http://tallbydesign.com.au/Products/Dresses---Tunics/Hepburn-Shift-Dress.aspx


6. Michael Sam and the NFL

Jon Stewart's view http://imgur.com/gallery/xUxXJ

Dallas sportcasters Dale Hansen's view http://globalnews.ca/news/1148267/watch-old-white-guy-defends-gay-black-nfl-prospect-in-surprising-rant/ (second video)

Facebook Gender and Pronoun Settings: Which Way Will You Go?

Great news!

Facebook now allows English (US) users to customise their gender!

Some of the options for custom gender!

You can choose from 50 different options! You can also choose who sees your gender, you, just a certain list of people, friends, or more!

50 options gave considerable choice. With no crossdresser option, I quickly whittled it down to five choices: trans, androgynous, non-gender, pangender, and genderqueer.

Trans is a great umbrella term. I would definitely use it if there was nothing better. But with 50 options surely I could drill down to something better?

Androgynous and non-gender did not really feel like me, since no-one ever has a doubt whether I'm projecting a gender.

So it really came down to two options - pangender and genderqueer. And to be honest, I didn't really know the difference between them!

So I went to Wikipedia, it told me:

Pangender: Pangender people are those who do not wish to be labeled as female or male in gender, as they feel that they do not fit into binary genders because they feel they are all genders. The term has a great deal of overlap with genderqueer and is used by those in the LGBT community meaning "all genders."

Genderqueer: Genderqueer (GQ; alternatively non-binary) is a catch-all category for gender identities other than man and woman, thus outside of the gender binary and cisnormativity. Genderqueer people may identify as one or more of the following: blurred genders, 2+ genders, no gender, third gender.

After reading that I was not surprised I didn't know the difference between the two terms! I specifically don't like labels of female and male since they are constricting of behaviour, so I went for pangender.

The next thing Facebook lets you pick is which pronouns you want used on you. They/she/he.

You can wish me a happy unbirthday too!

Clearly I was never going to pick he! But in the end decided on "she"

She! After all I said about being pangender! Yes, she. Because I want to be called female pronouns to balance out all the male pronouns I get called in my everyday life.

Have a play with it yourself and let me know what settings you pick!

Chat with Anika and Ally

This podcast I chat with my good crossdressing friend Anika, and her wonderful partner Ally.

You can download this and other podcasts from iTunes, search for The Genderqueer Universe.

Alternatively, right click on http://traffic.libsyn.com/crossdressingcanopy/20140209_-_Chat_with_Anika_and_Ally.mp3 to download the podcast.

Questions asked:

* Anika, when did you discover crossdressing?

* Anika, how do you identify on the crossdressing/trans spectrum?

* Ally, what was your initial response to finding out Anika crossdressed?

* Ally, what was your initial response to seeing Anika crossdressed?

* Anika, what do you enjoy about crossdressing?

* Anika, in the past, were you able to find support from family and/or friends?

* Ally, what impact does Anika's crossdressing have on your relationship?

* Ally, can you point to anything that made Anika more comfortable about her crossdressing?

* Both of you, how do you deal with telling friends and family about Anika?

* Anything else to add?

Vogue Australia: Mandarin Edition

Walking though Sydney's Chinatown I spotted a new free magazine: Vogue Australia: Mandarin Edition.

Interesting decision by Vogue, a premier brand, to associate itself with the free magazine trade. The magazine is unsurprisingly, thinner than the average Vogue magazine (80 pages, versus the 600+ of the bigger paid magazines) and has a similar high ratio of advertisements.

What really struck me was that some of the items were particularly pricey (even for Vogue)

This page in particular stood out:

3 Varolujan rings $51,700
Piaget broach style item $151,500
Piaget broach style item $524,600
Piaget necklace $244,810
Paspaley Tahitian necklace $364,000 (gorgeous though!)
Bulgari flower broach $8,300
Canturi flower ring $19,500
Cartier earrings $91,000
Dior timepiece (watch) $238,000
Bulgari ring $22,100
Dior broach $290,000
Paiget earrings $32,640
Bulgari necklace $62,600
plus two unpriced items

Total price $2.1 million (about US$1.8 million)

Such expensive items in a free magazine seems an interesting choice. The target market is clearly the new-China rich, but will they pick up a free publication? Time will tell.

Either way, it is a great way for me to practise my Mandarin! :)